Me

Allowing the negative to fade away

You’re going to go through tough times-that’s life. Nothing happens to you, it happens for you.  See the positive in negative events.  Joel Osteen

In July of 2012 I had a life changing experience.  Body altering surgery, pain both physical and mental and at times feelings of pure helplessness.  Over time, those feelings became ones of freedom.  Receiving the news that my post BPM biopsy was positive for lobular carcinoma in situ at first set me into a pure panic.  I remember the doctors call, feeling as if the room around me was closing in and the tears rolling down my cheeks.  Then the realization, I made the right decision.  Years of biopsies and worries of cancer were over.

From then on I have really seen things differently.  I refuse to allow the negative things in life to control my day.  Sure, I have moments but as a rule I am trying to live more of a “glass is half full” kind of life.  For years I often found myself in the middle of others drama or tried to mediate others dilemmas.  Recently, I have had to remind myself of what I realized almost 3 years ago, life is too short to be surrounded in negativity.

Not only is it too short but life moves way too fast!  It seems like just yesterday that my girls were born  and today I watched Madison perform on stage at her first talent show.  Megan attended her first dance the other night and both are growing into such beautiful girls.  Allowing myself to live in anyone else’s negativity removes my focus on what is important in life.  I will no longer feel guilty for allowing myself to focus on the positive things, I will not apologize for looking for the sun instead of the rain and I will not ask permission to smile.  I WILL surround myself and my family with others who feel the same!

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Me, My Family

Perseverance, unicorns and just a little pixie dust

Life is messy, and hard and sometimes downright  mean.  I would like to be able to tell my kids that it is filled with unicorns and roses but that would be silly, untrue and would not prepare them for the reality of the future.  I would like to tell them that they can just shut the door until the hard stuff is over but that would just make them victims to the evils that would eventually consume them.  I would like to tell them that they could close their eyes and wish it all away but in my opinion that would ensure them a future of failure.

unicorn-11273No, I tell my girls the truth.  The cold, hard and often ugly truth.  Life is unfair, hard and dirty at times and often it will disappoint you.  With that truth comes the real lesson, a lesson of perseverance that those who keep their heads up, those who work hard, those who strap in for the rough ride will succeed in the end and be the stronger for it!  My girls have lived this lesson from early ages.  I am sure they feel that their lives have been often unfair to this point, Madison being witness to my miscarriage, major health scares for both of their parents and more hospital visits than any child should have to endure.  They have seen their father work non stop only to have his pay cut and eventually be laid off by the same company.   I am fully aware that our lives are a paradise when compared to others.  We all have our struggles, how you deal with them makes us who we are.

I try to teach the girls that when life gets tough to face it and never give up.  I hope that my husband and I have modeled this same lesson for them.  There is often an easier way but it does not make it right.  Never run and never bury your head in the sand. Do not be afraid to try, to  fail, but NEVER stop trying, learn and grow and always keep smiling.

29a8d7a59eec706135ac1eb9fe9e26d1As meaningful as those lesson are, it is also important, more important  to celebrate the wins, the glass is half full side of things.  The fact that my girls are healthy and smart, athletic and kind.  The fact that after a tough search my husband has found a wonderful new job. From time to time, it is nice to live in a world of unicorns and when life is on an upswing you grab on with both hands!  How do you best celebrate the positive turn in events?  With a trip to Disney World of course!  Very soon we will be off to see that amazing Mouse!  For our family Disney is that place where you get to close your eyes and wish it away, that world where fantasy is reality and pixie dust rules the land!  I can not wait….Mickey we will be there soon!

2013 Magic!
2013 Magic!
Me, Post-Op Bilateral Prophylactic Mastectomy

A simple question

It is once again October and the Pink is flying.  Breast cancer awareness visually pushed into the forefront for all.  Put aside the millions being made by the CEO’s running the charities or those behind the merchandising of all of the apparel and take it for what it should be, a moment to step back and recognize that awareness, testing and early detection really does save lives.  So instead of a long-winded post rehashing my own story or one looking at so many strong women who have fought or are currently fighting this awful disease, I ask a simple question, when is the last time you had your mammogram?

If you would like to buy a pretty pink sweatshirt, pen, baseball bat or energy drink with the special label go right ahead but I ask you to go one step further.  If you yourself are due to see your doctor and have your scans get off your butt and make the call and schedule your appointment.  Today and all month-long as you interact with those women closest to you, remind them to do the same.

CLICK HERE FOR A LINK TO THE AMERICAN CANCER SOCIETY RECOMMENDATIONS FOR EARLY BREAST CANCER DETECTION