Tag: bilateral prophylactic mastectomy

Vicodine, therapy and the light at the end of the tunnel

So I had my doctor’s appointment today and it went well!  Here are the updates:

-Got a new script for vicodine which is half the strength of the oxy I had..which I had not been taking much anymore. They will be used sparringly just to take the edge off.

-I will be getting a call from Dr. Liu’s scheduler in the next few days to set up phase 2..Nip reconstruction to happen mid-August if all goes well with schedules.

-I have been cleared to drive AS LONG as I have not taken the vicodine from the first point

– We fully agree that the boobs are healing totally differently from each other and that they are totally different sizes. We have agreed that they are also still larger than I would like so all will be corrected during the next procedure.  He will actually make an incision on the sides removing what I have term the “air bags” that have grown under my arms and will liposuction anywhere else to even out.  (I envision more pain coming but at least the light at the end of this very long journey)

-He feels that most of my pain comes from scarring and has written me a script for Physical therapy if I want it..which I do not.  I have not been doing much since I thought I was not supposed to..now that I have been told to start SLOWLY I am ready.  Found a nice list of Occupational Therapy exercises for post mastectomy on Livestong .com and will do it myself.  I could give many excuses why I don’t want to do the therapy from my motion is improving greatly, the co-pay, 3 times a week for 8 weeks, two little kids with no one to watch them or the simple I am sick of doctors offices and I DON”T WANT TO!

-We are both very pleased at how the abdominal incision is healing.  He says to start using mederma  cream on it.

On the way home I laughed with my husband how numb you become to the process of these appointments.  My first appointment with a breast surgeon was 1994..I was 23.  At that time I was horrified at this man not just looking at the girls but touching them.  Almost 18 year later and 2 kids I sat there today topless doctor in his wheely chair between my legs squeezing the boobs as he developed his next plan of attack.  Not only am no longer  phased but we had an entire conversation as I pocked this one while he squeezed that one.  We need to get these babies right!  Amazing how things change over time  not sure if that is a good thing or bad one..guess it just is.

I am going to go and try my new exercises….anything would be good right!

The 4 weeks post BPM

So after a weekend of taking it easy, this morning the girls and I headed out for a nice walk for me and bike ride for them.  It is already pretty warm out but it really is a nice way to start the day when for the rest of it you are basically trapped.  We came in, grabbed some nice cold water and I am sitting quietly.  My abdomen does not really cause much discomfort anymore.  The only problem there is the pure weakness which I realize will take time to rebuild.

The issue is with the boobs.  I am still not allowed to wear a bra.  I honestly don’t know if wearing one would even help…I would probably just complain about have to wear it all of the time.  The odd shape and uneven size is a factor..I still feel like I am growing boobs under my arms especially on the left side.  That one is still at least a full size if not larger than the other one.  The right one though for some reason tends to ache more.  Go figure.  I still have some oxy’s left but don’t want to take them unless pain is really bad.  On the other hand, Tylenol/Motrin are not always enough to deal with the pain/ache.  I see the doctor tomorrow.  I want to ask if there is something else he can give me that is not as strong as the oxy but has more kick than the Motrin.  Funny I feel strange asking for more pain meds but I guess that shows that I am not some pill head…if I were guess I would not care about asking.

So the bike shorts I had been wearing have all gotten too loose..which is pretty cool to be honest.  I bought an actual abdominal wrap to keep as tight as possible.  My girls are great because the both grab an end and help me get it on even and tight.  They really have been wonderful helpers!

It is strange to think about, 4 weeks ago today I was still in surgery with my bilateral prophylactic mastectomy.  I would emerge in terrible pain I remember complaining about my shoulder the most. From what I understand, I was on the table for a bit over 12 hours with my arms straight over my head…in my own head I figure I was kind of supermanish.  Drains seeming like they were everywhere.  Monitors that would not stop beeping…oxygyn continually because I seemed to forget to breath from time to time with all the pain meds.  The joys of being surrounded by nurses 1-2 times a day for my “shift and raise” that was always a good time.

To be where I am now just 4 weeks later is an amazing testament to modern medicine.

I have my fingers crossed for my appointment tomorrow.  I so hope that we get the date scheduled for the final phase of this process.  Please please!!!!!

Frustrated and upset-4 weeks post BPM

So with each passing day I feel stronger, healthier and more able to return to normal life.  Then I attempt to do so and something happens that just smacks me in the face and says “no sorry you are weak”.  I am 4 weeks out of surgery, home for three. I don’t know what I expected and I have nothing really to judge against.  I feel like I should be fully functioning (not at the gym or carrying heavy items but normal life)…am I wrong?

SO what was the most recent slap you ask?  I have still been sleeping in the bed Frank had moved to the family room with several pillows behind my back (so basically a 45 degree angle roughly) and one on each side under my arms to keep me from attempting to roll over.  I still do not find the steps comfortable so I try to keep them limited.  Frank came home from New York so I went upstairs with him to talk while he unpacked.  I sat on the bed and took the pillows to place under my arms to see how much room I would take on the bed seeing if I could start to sleep back in my own room, bed with my husband.  Since I had put the pillows down to be by my sides there were none behind me so when I went to lay down I dropped like a rock.  I could not hold myself up at all and then to add insult to injury I laid there like a freaking turtle on it’s back and could not get up, stuck and on the verge of tears!  WTF!

I need help…to my blog friends, IS this normal, I mean am I progressing  normally? Am I behind?  Am I crazy?  DO I need to chill out?

I can’t stand this! I mean I knew I would not be ready for the olympic team but I did not think that at the 4 week mark I would still be stuck trying to rise from a simple flat position.