Tag: Mother

Perseverance, unicorns and just a little pixie dust

Life is messy, and hard and sometimes downright  mean.  I would like to be able to tell my kids that it is filled with unicorns and roses but that would be silly, untrue and would not prepare them for the reality of the future.  I would like to tell them that they can just shut the door until the hard stuff is over but that would just make them victims to the evils that would eventually consume them.  I would like to tell them that they could close their eyes and wish it all away but in my opinion that would ensure them a future of failure.

unicorn-11273No, I tell my girls the truth.  The cold, hard and often ugly truth.  Life is unfair, hard and dirty at times and often it will disappoint you.  With that truth comes the real lesson, a lesson of perseverance that those who keep their heads up, those who work hard, those who strap in for the rough ride will succeed in the end and be the stronger for it!  My girls have lived this lesson from early ages.  I am sure they feel that their lives have been often unfair to this point, Madison being witness to my miscarriage, major health scares for both of their parents and more hospital visits than any child should have to endure.  They have seen their father work non stop only to have his pay cut and eventually be laid off by the same company.   I am fully aware that our lives are a paradise when compared to others.  We all have our struggles, how you deal with them makes us who we are.

I try to teach the girls that when life gets tough to face it and never give up.  I hope that my husband and I have modeled this same lesson for them.  There is often an easier way but it does not make it right.  Never run and never bury your head in the sand. Do not be afraid to try, to  fail, but NEVER stop trying, learn and grow and always keep smiling.

29a8d7a59eec706135ac1eb9fe9e26d1As meaningful as those lesson are, it is also important, more important  to celebrate the wins, the glass is half full side of things.  The fact that my girls are healthy and smart, athletic and kind.  The fact that after a tough search my husband has found a wonderful new job. From time to time, it is nice to live in a world of unicorns and when life is on an upswing you grab on with both hands!  How do you best celebrate the positive turn in events?  With a trip to Disney World of course!  Very soon we will be off to see that amazing Mouse!  For our family Disney is that place where you get to close your eyes and wish it away, that world where fantasy is reality and pixie dust rules the land!  I can not wait….Mickey we will be there soon!

2013 Magic!
2013 Magic!

A never ending cycle, STOP

Our entire lives are spent working to prepare for the next thing.  Kindergarten is spent getting kids ready for first grade.  Stand in any first grade classroom throughout the day and you will hear continually that they will need to know this for second grade.  Elementary school is all about preparing for middle school, middle school for high school and the four years spent there is all about getting into the right college (or for many of what you could afford).  We go to college to be prepared for the real world and once there many feel they are totally not prepared!

What no one ever tells you is that there is just no end to the cycle.  When we are young we assume that it is all for a purpose, as if we will be rewarded as a result of our years of preparation.  Once out of school it is about working to get ahead or more the norm just to stay afloat.  Work hard, hard, harder just to pay your bills and don’t forget the outstretched hand of the government.  Property taxes, sales taxes, federal income taxes and for many of us state income taxes and now a presidential election where some say we still don’t pay enough.

Our lives lived as if we were merely hamsters on a wheel, running in circles.  images

Recently there has been much sadness around us.  Cancer, a very rare medical situation and a massive heart attack.  Taken much too young,  a friend, an acquaintance , a relative of a friend, all under 50 years.  Why does it take such tragedy to make you say STOP, if even for just a little while.  We spent the weekend as a family enjoying beautiful weather and some great soccer.

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Sure the bills must be paid and the tests taken.  The days will pass but we all need to make a conscience effort to enjoy the little things.  To stop and recognize the beauty of each day.  I am not an extremely religious person but I thank God for each morning I get to kiss the girls as I wake them or see them smile with each new achievement.  Life is too short, before you know it you are looking back wishing for one more moment.  Enjoy the moments while in them, smile more and worry less.  It’s easy enough to say right? I am willing to put in the effort!

 

 

Do you believe?

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I know people who have made the decision to tell their children that there is no Santa. Not because the child asked questions but because they were going to find out anyway. Before I give my opinion on that, let’s recap the first few minutes of the news cast I tuned into last night. Missing college student last seen at a bar well over a week ago disappeared without a trace. 17-year-old boy brutally attacked in an alley after leaving a party, caught on tape. Of course they show this tape over and over. There seems to be controversy over some grandmothers taped smoking pot and some local daycare conditions are filthy. There was a sexual assaults, we are waiting for DNA results in an old unsolved murder mystery and of course continued updates on riots and protests. Retail sales are down and the recent jobs numbers cheered by some are being shown to be “padded” creating only cheap part-time hourly jobs while full-time family supporting jobs actually saw a sharp decline. The economy is stagnant, the country is more split than ever in my life and the future seems just as bleak.Weihnachtsmann mit Rentierschlitten und Sternschnuppe

So, back to the situation with Santa and a question, what is wrong with a little magic? We all want to believe that magic is real. What is so wrong with allowing our youth to stay innocent as long as possible? The world is big and at times very harsh and ugly and in time everyone will have to face it head on. Is it so wrong to allow our 10 year olds to hold on the belief in a jolly old magical being for just one more year?  To allow them to feel safe watched over by loving beings?detail_450_10460

Many of us have the elves, those crazy little toys that we curse nightly as we climb and stretch moving them around trying to add a little extra magic to the season. Why? Because of the glow in the faces of my girls and millions of other children who wake each morning running through the house to see what the elf did last night after returning from the daily reporting trip to Santa. This year Santa Claus actually sent letters to the girls though the mail. They received them yesterday in the mailbox.  Pure childhood fascination swept over both as they read them, thrilled that Santa knew names of friends and teachers as well as things they are interested in. Those letters are now hanging on the refrigerator and have been read at least 20 times.  elf-on-the-shelf

It has been a tough year for our family as it has for many.  The amount of presents under the tree will be smaller.  It would be easy to allow the stress of the year to bring us down.  Instead I find this more motivation to get into the spirit and share some Christmas warmth.

I believe because my girls believe.

I believe because there is a true joy allowing yourself to be swept up in the magic.

I believe because the sound of Christmas bells are a happy and joyous sound, and I still hear them 🙂

I believe because the smell of cinnamon and chocolate  together in the air gives me the strength to face an otherwise grey day.

I believe because doing so even for a small part of the year reminds me to spread kindness in a world that is very short of it.

I believe because a strong imagination has guided me though many a dark day and will do the same for my children.

I believe because there has to be something more.

I love Christmas and all of the joy and magic that it brings.  I love the entire season and do not feel the need to argue over who is most important during this fine season. I do not mind saying happy holidays to those who do not share my religious background and I often find myself humming the dreidel song at some point during the season.  Love, joy, family, sharing and reflection on the things most important is what it should be about.  For me, that means keeping Santa as part of the celebration as long as possible, I for one think we all could all use a little magic!