I am not ready! The other night I attended the middle school orientation for the parents of incoming sixth graders at one of the local middle schools. The school itself is beautiful and huge. It was a bit intimidating to me. The high school I attended was tiny in comparison. It scares me a little to think of my baby walking the halls in September. In my mind, she is still the little baby who loved to be held and cuddled. Of course she is no longer that baby, she is a beautiful, intelligent, strong and confident young girl who is not only ready for the next stage but excited for it to come.
The process of our 6 elementary schools folding into 3 middle schools is actually a very well planned out chain of events that started a few weeks ago. A counselor visited the elementary school and talked to the kids followed a week later by the kids boarding a bus for a tour of their soon to be new school. Last week, the parents met with the Principal and in August there is a several day program in which the kids get used to the school, lockers and all of the wonderfully High School like world that our Middle school will provide.
When I went to school (way back when) I went to the same building for 8 years. There are more kids in the elementary school that Meg attends that were in my entire school and the middle school has almost 200 more kids that. I am finding myself a bit overwhelmed but like I stated earlier Megan is so excited. She has already been studying the list of clubs and is putting thought into how to decorate her locker. I am not ready!
Every night before I go to bed, I look in on the girls and stand for a minute and watch them sleep. Often I kiss a cheek or the top of a head and smile. I think of just how proud of them I am. I can not imagine a life without my girls, my family. Lately, when looking at Megan I wonder when it happened. When did that shy, timid little girl become the young lady who is about to become a middle schooler and test for her black belt in karate. It all happens too fast.
So here we sit ready to embark on another first, another new adventure. I will be there to celebrate the wins and to dry the tears. I will hide my unease because this is part of life, the necessary part where mommy can not control everything, the part where my little girl must take steps to build her future. I may not be ready but my wonderful, brilliant beautiful daughter is so I will kick and scream,(quietly behind a door) and probably shed a tear or two but away we go. Ready or not, I will be with you every step of the way!