When I was younger I swore I would never have children. They were dirty, needy and would just get in the way. I had visions of being the CEO of IBM. As with most of us, the visions of a young person grow and change as we do.
I did well in my career but something was missing. I remember when I held my Megan for the first time, her wide open bright eyes looking up at me, I swear she actually waved. That was it. That was all I needed to know that there was no job in the world that could ever be as fulfilling as staying with my baby. I have been fortunate enough to be a part of every aspect of my girls development. Financially it has not always been easy but it has been the most rewarding job ever!
Being a Mother has been an adventure, figuring it out day by day. Frank and I don’t have any parental guidance and I never had the perfect role model. My relationship with my mother was not perfect, whose is? At the time it was all I knew. Some will say she was a difficult person and I would agree. She was a functioning alcoholic and in those days this was acceptable. She had a temper and was not what anyone would call “warm and fuzzy”. There were not many hugs or “I love you’s” in our house. With that said, she raised three children alone, kept a nice home for us against all odds and ensured that we had the best education possible to enable all three of us to improve our own lives. I am blessed to have had such a strong woman as a mother.
As I raise my own children I struggle to find the right balance. Many of their friends are handed everything with no understanding of the value attached to the items. Too many parents would rather be a friend than parent. I never want to have the heavy hand I was raised with yet I want to ensure there is structure and discipline, but discipline filled with love. Yes there is such a thing. The ability to say “no” to your children, to realize that they may get mad at you and life will go on.
Being a parent is not always easy, as a matter of fact uneasy is how I feel much of the time. So many firsts in life that need to be explained. Hurt feelings, confusion and the unknown are all a part of everyday life and I love it! Each day is an adventure and I look forward to every one of them!