Tag: Health

My Holy Shit Day!

This may be the first time I have ever done a double post.  I received my Pathology report today finally.  I must start with there was NO cancer as expected Thank God!  With that said, it was also a very scary call.  As I stated earlier in the blog, I decided to have the Bilateral Prophylactic Mastectomy due to the findings of Atypical lobular hyperplasia mixed with my mothers history which resulted in a 50-50 chance of cancer myself.  SO, we expected to find this in the path reports.

What we did not expect was what was also found.  Lobular Carcinoma In Situ.

“Lobular carcinoma in situ (LCIS) is technically not cancer; but, because it is a marker for the development of all types of invasive and non-invasive breast cancers, LCIS is often thought of as a form of breast cancer.”

Holy Shit!  It has been a day filled with emotion….obviously thrilled that I am cancer free!  BUT…one of the options given to me was increased screening blah blah.

“Lobular carcinoma in situ usually has no symptoms. Many times, it’s not even detected by routine screening mammograms. This is because, unlike other breast cancers and related conditions, LCIS does not result in the formation of calcium deposits in certain breast cells.:”

For anyone who is faced with the high risk decisions to have the BPM or not….do it!  Had I waited another year or two?  How different could things have been for my family?  I am blessed to not have to answer that question!

2 weeks and moving forward

The house is quiet….the cherubs have gone to spend a few days with my sister.  She has wanted them to visit for a while now and with the recovery the time seemed perfect.  I feel bad that they were just stuck sitting around with me, and honestly they have been driving me crazy!  My sister lives at the Jersey Shore (not the Snookie shore).  It should be a fun couple of days for the three of them…I hope :-)!

So some updates. My abdominal incision is really healing nicely.  Still very sore on the left side because of that annoying ever-present drain but other than that very pleased with the way that it is healing.  The boobs are another story.  They are growing more and more uncomfortable with each passing day.  I think there are two reasons for this, first the swelling is going down so the feeling is coming back and they have been through a lot!  I think the other reason is a bit self-induced.  I really tried to be the super woman and go oxy free.  I think that also may account for many of the tears lately.  I realize that maybe being the martyr is not good for anyone.

My mobility is progressing nicely.  I can lift my right arm fully above my head and the left is close.  Thankfully my back is also feeling much better.

I tried to shower the other day.  I was cleared to do such AS LONG as I was able to keep the remaining drain completely dry.  I really really wanted to shower. I tried to cover it with plastic but was still concerned the tape would give.  Instead of a full shower I had to just use the handheld shower nozzle…still the best washing I have been able to manage but I would really love to stand under the running warm water of a shower!  I am back at the doctor Wednesday and high hopes that the drain comes out.

I am still wrapping my head around the fact that after all that agonizing waiting, two weeks ago today I had a Bilateral Prophylactic Mastectomy.  And if that was not enough, at the same time had my abdomen cut from one end to the other , (DIEP Flap) in order to  “relocate”  flesh to build the newbies.  And although I have had periods of self-pity, sadness and  moodiness  I and fully aware of how well I am healing and fell totally empowered and in full control of my future!

No Bra

So when I was at the doctors the other day he reaffirmed that I am under no circumstances to wear a bra until at least the next time I see him in 3 weeks.  No Bra…last time I can say that I could get away with walking around town (not that I am going anywhere right now), without being ticketed or poking myself in the eye was like maybe when I was 12?

Heading into the surgery I was a 40DD.   I had thought about reduction for a while but once this process started it was like “all in”.  We agreed that we would be going smaller but he could not guarantee a size per say and that we would need to “tweak” the initial work which would be done at the time of the nipple reconstruction.

So the no bra thing is really is not a problem at all for a few reasons, first they are still so swollen they are like annoying (yet non moving) bricks on my chest.  Second, I am not going anywhere fast right now, and third they are well, not at all “boob” shaped.  They are clearly different sizes and I swear they point in different directions. They strike me as more square.  I will need another small procedure probably in about 4-5 weeks back in the main hospital OR.  my Surgeon say it will be about a 2 hour process where he will hide the flap, build new nips and liposuction the new bricks boobs. The plan is that since I was so large anyway, to utilize the extra skin that would have been cut away in surgery.  Instead of having to harvest skin for the new nips, he will gather what is forming around the new flaps as the swelling goes down and make the nip out of it , at the same time hiding the flap and  creating a nice “boob” shape.   The doctor says they will be lovely when finished and not to worry.  Honestly, I am not at all worried.  I fully trust in my plastic surgeon and the “boobie vision” he has painted for me.  For now I have been hanging out in a tank top which I pin the last drain to but then put a baggy button down over top.  It works.

Anyway, yesterday was a down day.  I really spent the day just lying around and napping.  Frank took the girls out for a few hours in the afternoon which was great.  I had no real energy or inclination to do anything more than hang out in my size smaller bike shorts. Sleeping is improving (still with assistance).  Almost made it through the night.  Closest I have come anyway!