Worry

SO as the time draws closer, my thoughts have been increasingly drifting to my daughters.  Not the same worries about them dealing with me.  These concerns are bigger and more concerning to me.  See I am high risk due to my mothers cancer and my own pathology.  I was never tested for the BRCA gene since it really did not matter to my own risk factor. A positive test maybe would have put me closer to 80% or so… 50-50 was enough for me.

I am half of the plot for my girls.  I honestly do not remember if I ever mentioned that I never met my mother in law.  She passed when my husband was in College.  She also had breast cancer.  So I place myself back in the office and my meeting with the Genetic Counselor but the patients are now my own babies. Two grandmothers with breast cancer, one diagnosed under age 50.  Mother…hmmm, how do I fit? No actual cancer but abnormal cells…. Mental note to make sure the girls have a very clear understanding of exactly why I am having this surgery.

I guess the best thing to do right now is get through the surgery.  During my followup visits I think I will have to run my concern by some folks.

I will do whatever is needed.