Tag: Health

Worry

SO as the time draws closer, my thoughts have been increasingly drifting to my daughters.  Not the same worries about them dealing with me.  These concerns are bigger and more concerning to me.  See I am high risk due to my mothers cancer and my own pathology.  I was never tested for the BRCA gene since it really did not matter to my own risk factor. A positive test maybe would have put me closer to 80% or so… 50-50 was enough for me.

I am half of the plot for my girls.  I honestly do not remember if I ever mentioned that I never met my mother in law.  She passed when my husband was in College.  She also had breast cancer.  So I place myself back in the office and my meeting with the Genetic Counselor but the patients are now my own babies. Two grandmothers with breast cancer, one diagnosed under age 50.  Mother…hmmm, how do I fit? No actual cancer but abnormal cells…. Mental note to make sure the girls have a very clear understanding of exactly why I am having this surgery.

I guess the best thing to do right now is get through the surgery.  During my followup visits I think I will have to run my concern by some folks.

I will do whatever is needed.

Rounding third…

We are in the home stretch now!  No more party to the table and I think giving my liver the next week off will be a good idea.

This week will be all about wrapping up loose ends and preparing things for the family as much as possible before Monday.  I did some yard work today…pruning things that I don’t like Frank to do.  He is missing some of the “finesse” that is needed.  Then finished cleaning the guest room for my sister-in-law.  I have to say, it is nice to have that room available again.  It has been a storage room for us and a real mess for the last few years.

The girls and I also gave the dog a bath which was much-needed! Then we just laid around.  I really wanted to take a nap but they took turns laying with me, being tickled and just spending time.  How could I tell them no when we will not be able to do this again for weeks or months even?

Tomorrow marks the 7 day mark….one week until surgery.  Wow!

What a day

What a morning.  As I continue my party to the operating room agenda, I had a big reality check this morning…I am not a young party animal anymore!  We had friends over last evening and had a great time as did the kids.  They watched movies and played all night in the basement until one by one they all fell asleep. MY mix of B-52’s and beer made for an extremely rough morning the likes of which I don’t think I have seen since college…nor do I plan on repeating any time soon!  It was a great time though!

Happy Fathers day to my husband.  The kids have kept him busy all day washing the car then reading together under the willow tree.  Very cute!  Then wrapped up the afternoon going for ice cream…for dinner.  Not an activity I would normally approve of but hey..guess once in a while it can’t hurt.

I did finally talk to the girls today.  I did not tell them more than they really needed to know.  I stressed that I was not sick and by doing this would not get sick.  They reacted according to their normal personalities..Madison started talking loud and fast and running up and down the hall way between questions.  I will need to keep an eye on her.  It is still processing in her little 5-year-old brain.  She did tell me that she did not want to visit me in the hospital because of what happened last year.  She said it scared her and she did not want to go back.  I told her that I fully understood.

Megan on the other hand is my worrier .  She tried to be tough until I told her that it was alright to tell me what she was thinking.  Then the tears came.  Lots of hugs between questions.  She seems fine now.  I guess we will take it day by day.

We are now just 2 weeks away from the mastectomy.  Wow..almost hard to wrap my head around.  After a year of biopsy, scans, appointments and worry we are almost there.  Finally!  I can not wait until it is over!